Things I Don't Make My Husband Do

Once upon a time, and truly, I think it was only once, I went grocery shopping with Eamonn. He was still my boyfriend then, but truly I only recall going to the grocery store together once. It was very early days in our relationship and I think we were planning to cook dinner together, so off we went to peruse the aisles of Kroger to decide what to make.

We are a Divide and Conquer family. If I'm at the grocery store, it's usually during the day when he's at work. Or if it's the weekend, he's doing something with the boys or working on the house. We don't have enough time for both of us to take off and go to the store. We've got things to do!

The reason this is on my brain is that yesterday I was in Denver for a meeting. If I have to go to Denver and if I need something (or one could argue even if I don't need something), I'll stop by Kohl's. We don't have a Kohl's in the valley. I confess, I miss it. I like Kohl's.

Anyway, I was pulling up to Kohl's and I saw a couple heading in together. I giggled a little. Of course, Eamonn and I have been in Kohl's together before. Trips like that usually mean I have indicated that his wardrobe is in a shambles and he needs to buy something new, so I drag him there when there's a sale. But frankly, more often than not, I go in, pick stuff out and bring it home. That was easier when we lived 10 minutes from Kohl's, but we still use that strategy. He's not a big shoppper. Big surprise.

So seeing that couple walking into Kohl's got me thinking about things I don't make my husband do:

1. Go shopping with me--grocery store or otherwise. I can't imagine parading out of the fitting room in multiple outfits for his review. Plus, I try to keep what I buy pretty much of a secret, pulling it out of my closet as needed and hoping he doesn't notice I've even been shopping. And as for the grocery store, as long as there's food in the fridge, he seems happy.

2. Watch Woman TV or Chick Flicks. Every once in awhile, he'll humor me on a special occasion and sit through something his friends will make fun of him for. Like the time we went to see You've Got Mail on our second anniversary. But there are limits. Like the time I wanted to see Mama Mia. I confirmed that he did NOT want to go, and I was right, and I went with my sister and her friends. We sang through the whole thing. There was one guy, one sad, embarassed guy, in the whole theater. He was there with his girlfriend. And he was slumped so far down in his seat you could just see the top of his head. I bet they broke up the next day. Heck, I would have dumped her, too. Get a clue, girlfriend. If want to watch Woman TV, I go to another part of the house. Like when I want to watch Oprah.

3. Eat frou frou food or a meal that nothing has died for. Or lentils. One time in our newlywed days, I slaved for hours over this lentil casserole with this special topping. He was about to eat it, fork poised at his lips, and he said, "I love everything except lentils." So never again.

4. Go on beach vacations. Or any other vacation where you sit around. One must be doing something on vacation.

5. Wear dress up clothes unless there is a wedding or funeral, and sometimes not even then.

It's taken 16 years, but I'm learning the ropes.