Monday, April 13, 2009

The Sisterhood of the Shrinking Pants

I know I've written about this before, but I continue to be mystified and intrigued by the phenomenon I am now calling the Incredible Shrinking Pants.

According to the scale, I'm not gaining weight. But something is definitely afoot because my pants just get smaller and smaller. Yes, I realize that if I didn't put my pants in the dryer this wouldn't happen, but here's my point: why aren't Eamonn's pants constantly shrinking? I wash his pants in the exact same load of laundry as my pants. His pants to not seem to be shrinking.

Perhaps it's the different fabrics--something woven into my pants that is slightly different causing shrinkage. But this doesn't explain why even when I wear men's jeans, they also shrink. And Eamonn's don't. My secret theory on this is that all pants, men's or women's, are sprayed with a substance that can sense estrogen. And when the substance connects with estrogen, the garment then shrinks in the wash. Clothing companies then achieve the dual goals of women having to continually shop for new pants and making us hate our bodies because obviously we're getting fatter and fatter all the time because our pants don't fit.

But they're not fooling me.


Jane Copes (Professor Sepoc) said...

And at some point in the past few years, sewing pattern sizes have changed in the WRONG direction. I remember an adjustment in the opposite direction in the very dim past, but this one is definitely an conspiracy.

Don't children's pants shrink the long way too? I think they do.

Leeann said...

Same observation has been noted here!

Mountain Mama said...

Someone is out to get us women!!

M said...

...I think it's the closet where that shrinking takes place!

1dreamr said...

Hmmm... I definitely think you've figured that one out!! :-)

Kristie said...

My pants also shrink mysteriously in the dryer. However, my scale shows that I *HAVE* been gaining weight. So perhaps, in hindsight, not so mysterious.